WHAT HAPPENED WHILE HERO WAS DEAD (Luke)
Johnny Carson School of Theatre & Film
Author
04/30/2025
Added
3
Plays
Description
Benedick shares his fantasy of the perfect woman with Hero.
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- [00:00:00.000]See, that's the problem. You're very nice and that's not interesting to me, you know?
- [00:00:09.000]It doesn't heat me up in any meaningful way.
- [00:00:13.000]You see, I want someone who's just gonna ruin my fucking life. Like, bad.
- [00:00:21.000]See, I want a woman who's gonna, like, set my horse on fire or, like, stand on my face
- [00:00:28.000]while she tells me how much she wants to fuck my brother.
- [00:00:31.000]Like, if I had one, that is totally something she would do.
- [00:00:35.000]Or maybe she'd bite off my ear. You know, just spitballing.
- [00:00:40.000]You know? Oh, and then maybe she'd swallow my ear.
- [00:00:43.000]And then I'd be all like, "You bitch, you swallowed my ear."
- [00:00:46.000]And then she'd be all like,
- [00:00:47.820]call me a bitch again and I'll fucking kill you.
- [00:00:50.010]And then I would say, you bitch.
- [00:00:52.410]And then she'd fucking kill me.
- [00:00:53.950]And then she'd gnaw the flesh off my bones
- [00:00:59.610]till her face was all bloody and gross.
- [00:01:02.710]And then I'd just be this pile of meat.
- [00:01:05.290]Just like a pile of meat in a pile.
- [00:01:13.370]She'd be eating it.
- [00:01:16.550]Yeah.
- [00:01:17.390]There is no normal sex.
- [00:01:24.650]We're all freaks, hero.
- [00:01:27.110]We've all got these ragged little broken pieces
- [00:01:29.570]banging around inside our rib cage
- [00:01:31.790]and they make us
- [00:01:34.510]want weird shit.
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