Ambiguous Loss and Agriculture - Signs and Symptoms, Impact with Dr. Michelle Krehbiel Full Interview

Linda Reddish Author

09/29/2023 Added

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In this video, Extension Educator John Fech interviews 4-H Extension Specialist Dr. Michelle Krehbiel. Together the two explore the concept of ambiguous loss, a complex and unresolved loss that can be difficult to cope with. Key highlights in the video include the importance of acknowledging the loss and taking steps to improve the situation. Key action steps include having a sense of hope, keeping a sense of humor, building community, talking to peers, and seeking support groups in helping individuals cope with ambiguous loss.

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[00:00:00.440](gentle music)
[00:00:07.290]Hi, I am John Fech with Nebraska Extension
[00:00:09.870]and welcome to this video on Ambiguous Loss.
[00:00:12.900]Joining me here in the studio is Michelle Krehbiel,
[00:00:15.540]4H Youth Development Specialist.
[00:00:18.930]Michelle, when ambiguous loss is experienced
[00:00:21.900]by individuals, families, ag producers,
[00:00:25.470]what are some of the common effects?
[00:00:27.840]Well, that's a good question, John.
[00:00:29.460]And I'll just say, first of all, ambiguous loss depends
[00:00:33.060]on kind of the situation and the person.
[00:00:35.910]Ambiguous loss really is just complicated.
[00:00:38.730]It is loss that's usually unresolved
[00:00:41.550]or really doesn't have any closure.
[00:00:43.740]And these elements can make it hard for someone
[00:00:47.100]to kind of begin coping or dealing with the situation.
[00:00:51.810]That ambiguity makes it hard to get a sense
[00:00:54.660]of what's really happening.
[00:00:57.150]Life may seem unfair, the loss may feel isolating
[00:01:01.410]because you feel like no one else is going through it
[00:01:03.930]at the time and those things can be really challenging
[00:01:07.560]to overcome and that's one of the reasons why ambiguous loss
[00:01:10.950]is pretty complicated.
[00:01:12.900]It sounds like acknowledgement of the loss is important.
[00:01:16.650]So once the person has acknowledged the ambiguous loss,
[00:01:21.240]what are some of the steps that can be taken then
[00:01:23.970]to improve the situation?
[00:01:25.620]Well, there's many things that can be done,
[00:01:27.120]and I will wanna say about the process in this
[00:01:30.000]is not linear.
[00:01:31.590]You're not gonna move from step A to step B to step C.
[00:01:35.010]It may be you move to step A to step C
[00:01:37.650]or if there is a step C, this is all kind of, this again,
[00:01:41.220]is what makes it complicated and kind of messy.
[00:01:44.220]You want people to name what the loss is.
[00:01:47.040]That's one part of this.
[00:01:48.600]It's kind of a recipe, I would say, John,
[00:01:50.670]and the ingredients I'm gonna give you here
[00:01:52.320]really are just about a recipe to help
[00:01:54.600]with healing and coping.
[00:01:56.850]One of the challenges with ambiguous loss
[00:01:59.070]is that it can become frozen.
[00:02:01.380]You can't move on, the status quo has been familiar
[00:02:06.030]and comforting, but moving on is really challenging.
[00:02:09.390]So naming feelings is an important things.
[00:02:12.600]Naming the loss, making some kind of meaning
[00:02:16.560]of kind of the new experience
[00:02:19.260]or the new situation is important.
[00:02:21.750]So rethinking identity.
[00:02:23.610]So if a farmer has a disability because
[00:02:27.210]or has experienced an illness because of the farm renaming
[00:02:31.140]or rethinking their identity as a cattleman
[00:02:33.840]or as a crops person,
[00:02:36.900]those can be things that need to happen.
[00:02:39.750]Having this sense of hope, getting a sense of hope
[00:02:42.420]is where we want people to kind of maybe come
[00:02:45.030]down further line.
[00:02:45.863]But even that's even important in the middle of it.
[00:02:48.570]Keeping a sense of humor is always important.
[00:02:51.930]So sometimes there's some things that are just funny.
[00:02:54.330]If you're experiencing or a caregiver for somebody
[00:02:56.820]with dementia, sometimes you have to laugh
[00:02:59.760]when somebody says something funny
[00:03:02.060]because you need that sense of humor
[00:03:04.380]to keep light of the situation.
[00:03:06.570]Building community and talking with your peers
[00:03:09.210]and support groups is extremely important.
[00:03:12.420]Saying things out loud helps it become more real.
[00:03:15.990]It helps validate that and is an important part of that.
[00:03:18.900]Taking care of yourself.
[00:03:20.130]There's a variety of ways that that need
[00:03:22.359]that can happen for people.
[00:03:24.240]So all of these are part of that important recipe in working
[00:03:28.710]to kind of move on or not becoming stuck in the grief.
[00:03:32.400]Now, you mentioned support groups.
[00:03:34.470]What are some of these organizations
[00:03:36.360]or groups that people can look to for assistance?
[00:03:39.930]So there's a variety of things.
[00:03:41.220]There may be things in your physical community.
[00:03:43.320]So I often think of things like, you know,
[00:03:46.590]an Alzheimer's support group, Alcoholics Anonymous,
[00:03:50.430]or anyone's, if you're have a loved one
[00:03:52.560]who's facing an addiction or has an addiction,
[00:03:55.110]Al-Anon, some of those.
[00:03:56.970]There are also, you know, support groups
[00:03:58.590]for medical illnesses whether it be cancer
[00:04:00.960]or whatever the case may be.
[00:04:02.490]There are grief support groups,
[00:04:04.110]so look at what your community resources are.
[00:04:07.110]There also may be some online groups
[00:04:08.970]that would be helpful as well.
[00:04:10.830]Schools can help as well.
[00:04:12.450]So it may be a place that your child can,
[00:04:14.670]you can utilize the school counselor
[00:04:16.299]or the school psychologist or the school social worker.
[00:04:19.859]Faith communities and faith leaders are really
[00:04:23.430]an important part of that.
[00:04:24.810]So there's lots of different things available to people
[00:04:28.050]depending on your circumstances, both kind of face-to-face
[00:04:31.320]and in the online or virtual sense as well.
[00:04:34.500]Alright, well Michelle, thank you
[00:04:35.610]for sharing all that great information
[00:04:37.500]and thank you for watching this video.
[00:04:39.459]For help with other parts of ambiguous loss,
[00:04:42.870]click on the other videos found on this webpage.
[00:04:45.876](gentle music continues)

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Ambiguous Loss and Agriculture - Signs and Symptoms, Impact with Dr. Michelle Krehbiel Full Interview

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