What Can I Do When My Child is Whining
University Nebraska Lincoln
Author
05/27/2022
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Description
Helpful hints on what can I do when my child is whining
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- [00:00:01.899]"Fit and Healthy Kids,"
- [00:00:03.830]an early childhood podcast.
- [00:00:07.250]Hello from the University of Nebraska-Lincoln.
- [00:00:09.800]This is LaDonna Werth and Lisa Poppe,
- [00:00:12.310]extension educators in the field of early childhood.
- [00:00:15.800]We are here to talk about the littles in your life.
- [00:00:19.050]In our field, we hear from parents all the time
- [00:00:21.610]about how frustrated they are with their children whining.
- [00:00:25.440]Lisa, can you help us understand why children whine?
- [00:00:29.292]Well, there are few behaviors
- [00:00:30.970]that are more frustrating to parents than whining.
- [00:00:34.110]Yet for children,
- [00:00:35.210]whining can be a quick and easy way
- [00:00:37.110]to get a parent's full attention.
- [00:00:39.280]Children whine when they feel overwhelmed
- [00:00:41.720]by an emotion or desire,
- [00:00:43.660]or they don't have the vocabulary to express their feelings.
- [00:00:47.480]They also might whine when they do not have the skills
- [00:00:50.010]to complete a task, or because they feel tired
- [00:00:53.080]or maybe they're hungry or lonely.
- [00:00:55.840]Just remember, children whine to ask for help.
- [00:00:59.050]You can help your child figure out why he is whining
- [00:01:02.060]and help him to find a better way to communicate.
- [00:01:05.220]So let's talk a little bit more about
- [00:01:08.370]how we can help our children to stop that whining process.
- [00:01:12.500]Well, your child will continue to whine
- [00:01:14.550]until you teach him a new skill.
- [00:01:16.720]So when you give in to that whine
- [00:01:18.720]for a candy at the checkout counter,
- [00:01:21.100]you are teaching him that his whining behavior is working
- [00:01:24.510]and he should use it again.
- [00:01:26.560]When you take away your son's favorite toy
- [00:01:28.740]because he won't stop whining,
- [00:01:30.680]you increase his feelings of insecurity
- [00:01:32.910]and actually also increase the likelihood
- [00:01:35.150]that he will whine more often.
- [00:01:37.130]Instead, you can teach him to use his words
- [00:01:40.190]to tell you about his feelings.
- [00:01:42.090]And together, you can come up with a way
- [00:01:44.220]to solve this problem.
- [00:01:46.410]Lisa, can you give us a tip
- [00:01:48.140]to help our children to stop whining?
- [00:01:51.000]Sure.
- [00:01:51.833]Teach your child that his needs get met
- [00:01:54.110]when he uses his words.
- [00:01:56.040]If he is wanting for milk,
- [00:01:57.870]tell him, "You can say, 'Daddy, milk please.'"
- [00:02:00.800]When he uses those words, follow up by saying,
- [00:02:03.387]"Of course, I will get you your milk.
- [00:02:04.997]"Thank you for using your words."
- [00:02:07.010]And remember, if your child often whines when she is tired,
- [00:02:11.330]consider running errands before or after her nap time
- [00:02:14.400]when she is rested.
- [00:02:16.330]So Lisa, what is the bottom line
- [00:02:18.410]of why children do whine?
- [00:02:21.090]Well, whining is a common way for your child
- [00:02:23.280]to tell you that she needs help.
- [00:02:25.820]Until she learns a new way to get your attention,
- [00:02:28.490]she will likely continue to whine.
- [00:02:30.970]You can teach and show your child how to use your words
- [00:02:34.120]to clearly express her needs.
- [00:02:36.380]Children who are confident talking about their emotions
- [00:02:39.190]and feel heard by their parents are less likely to whine.
- [00:02:42.830]This has been LaDonna and Lisa
- [00:02:44.760]with the University Nebraska-Lincoln.
- [00:02:46.940]Until next time.
- [00:02:48.310]Enjoy your family time together.
- [00:02:50.827]"Fit and Healthy Kids" is a co-production
- [00:02:53.130]of Nebraska Extension, Georgia Extension,
- [00:02:55.690]Kansas State Extension, South Dakota State Extension,
- [00:02:58.850]and the Iowa Child Care Resource and Referral.
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