Teachable Moments After a Meltdown

University of Nebraska Lincoln Author

05/27/2022 Added

2 Plays

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Helpful hints on how to help a child after a meltdown.

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[00:00:00.641](upbeat music)
[00:00:02.130]Fit and Healthy Kids,
[00:00:03.820]an early childhood podcast.
[00:00:06.030]Hello, from the University of Nebraska-Lincoln,
[00:00:09.030]Nebraska Extension educators,
[00:00:11.110]LaDonna Werth and Lisa Poppe are here to talk with you
[00:00:14.570]about early childhood,
[00:00:16.380]what's new, what's happening, and what's for you.
[00:00:19.711](upbeat music)
[00:00:21.350]Does this sound familiar?
[00:00:23.220]Your children are playing in the living room
[00:00:25.400]while you are cleaning up the kitchen.
[00:00:27.700]You answer the phone.
[00:00:29.520]A few minutes later, one child is angry
[00:00:33.100]and screaming because someone took her toys
[00:00:37.570]and the other one is in tears,
[00:00:39.850]her sister hit her.
[00:00:42.120]Lisa, what do we do in moments like this?
[00:00:45.350]Well, this sounds like a meltdown.
[00:00:47.760]It is in escalated moments like this
[00:00:49.500]that parents often find themselves trying
[00:00:51.470]to teach rules or give long explanations.
[00:00:54.800]Unfortunately, in moments such as this,
[00:00:56.980]your child usually is not even hearing your words,
[00:00:59.740]let alone hearing the rule.
[00:01:01.610]This is not a teachable moment.
[00:01:04.320]But there are countless teachable moments daily
[00:01:06.560]when skills can be taught and emotions discussed,
[00:01:09.200]such as during playtime, in the car,
[00:01:12.460]at bath time, or while reading together.
[00:01:15.470]As a parent, you can reduce challenging behaviors
[00:01:18.170]such as hitting, biting, pushing, and whining
[00:01:21.070]when you first concentrate on calming your child
[00:01:23.710]during a challenging behavior incident.
[00:01:25.570]And second,
[00:01:26.830]wait until an appropriate teachable moment
[00:01:29.200]to actually teach your child.
[00:01:31.640]Can you tell us more
[00:01:32.870]about what are teachable moments?
[00:01:35.400]Well, for instance, during breakfast time,
[00:01:38.690]intentionally teach the skill of sharing by saying,
[00:01:42.327]"Thank you for sharing the syrup with your sister."
[00:01:45.280]When your children are playing on the floor quietly,
[00:01:47.880]sit on the floor with them, make eye contact and say,
[00:01:51.337]"Wow, you girls have been playing for 10 minutes quietly.
[00:01:54.610]Tell me about what you were building."
[00:01:56.770]This teaches the desired behavior
[00:01:58.900]of playing quietly together.
[00:02:00.840]What are some teachable moments
[00:02:02.700]throughout the day, Lisa?
[00:02:03.900]There are so many teachable moments,
[00:02:06.650]like playtime for instance.
[00:02:08.130]It's a great time to respond
[00:02:09.640]and to calm a challenging behavior.
[00:02:11.957]"Oh no, I see that your bunny is super sad."
[00:02:14.470]Her sister's trying to take her toy.
[00:02:16.280]I wonder what she can do.
[00:02:18.220]You can teach appropriate ways of getting her needs met.
[00:02:21.480]She can ask for help, get a timer,
[00:02:23.850]or trade her sister for another toy.
[00:02:26.380]Bath time can be a teachable time too.
[00:02:29.440]The water stays in the tub.
[00:02:31.020]You can use the cup and pour water
[00:02:32.570]into another cup or you can pour water on your body.
[00:02:36.690]Teaching friendship skills during car time.
[00:02:39.157]"I saw that your friend Bella was sad at school today
[00:02:42.760]and you made her a picture.
[00:02:44.550]I bet that really made her feel better.
[00:02:46.600]What a great friend you are."
[00:02:48.830]Also using books during story time can teach emotions.
[00:02:52.737]"Wow, that little girl in this book is really angry.
[00:02:56.340]I saw that she asked her mom for a hug.
[00:02:58.500]That is a great way to feel better.
[00:03:00.410]I wonder what you can do when you feel angry."
[00:03:03.720]And also, use meal time to teach expectations.
[00:03:07.580]Say, "Let's practice asking for more milk."
[00:03:10.670]Role-play with whining, yelling,
[00:03:12.690]or just banging your cup,
[00:03:14.020]and then teach the expected behavior.
[00:03:16.800]You can ask nicely and say, "Mommy, milk please."
[00:03:20.090]When she does this, jump up and say,
[00:03:22.437]"I'm happy to get you milk."
[00:03:24.660]These are just a few examples that can happen every day.
[00:03:28.820]Great advice, Lisa.
[00:03:30.700]As parents of young children, we can help them learn.
[00:03:34.400]We are always teaching children.
[00:03:36.400]Strolling in the park, reading books,
[00:03:39.220]and giving her a kiss before bed,
[00:03:41.630]all teaches her about her world.
[00:03:44.900]We can use the many calm and happy moments in our day
[00:03:48.740]to intentionally teach expectations, rules,
[00:03:52.550]and skills that will help our children to be successful
[00:03:56.970]and reduce challenging behavior.
[00:03:59.620]This has been LaDonna and Lisa
[00:04:01.560]with the University of Nebraska-Lincoln.
[00:04:03.740]Until next time, enjoy your family time together.
[00:04:07.095](upbeat music)
[00:04:07.928]Fit and Healthy Kids is a co-production
[00:04:10.010]of Nebraska Extension, Georgia Extension
[00:04:12.600]Kansas State Extension, South Dakota State Extension,
[00:04:15.770]and the Iowa Childcare Resource & Referral.
[00:04:18.565](upbeat music)

Teachable Moments After a Meltdown

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