Why Children Do Not Follow Their Parents Directions - Holt Boyd Podcast
LaDonna Werth and Lisa Poppe - Early Childhood Extension Educators
Author
05/09/2022
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5
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Do you ever get the feeling your children are not listening to you? What happens if the parent gives too many directions at one time? Have you tried the Do-WAWP method?
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- [00:00:00.000]Fit and Healthy Kids
- [00:00:02.400]An Early Childhood Podcast (with music).
- [00:00:05.000](LaDonna Werth) - Hello from the
- [00:00:07.070]University of Nebraska-Lincoln.
- [00:00:09.025]Nebraska Extension Educators LaDonna Werth
- [00:00:11.795]and Lisa Poppe are here to talk with you
- [00:00:14.265]about early childhood - what's new
- [00:00:16.415]and what's happening and what's for you.
- [00:00:21.080]Do you ever get the feeling your children
- [00:00:23.750]are not listening to you and everyone
- [00:00:25.889]is upset with each other?
- [00:00:27.990]We hear parents say “Why do I have to
- [00:00:30.350]repeat myself time and time again?”
- [00:00:33.369]“Why doesn't she listen to me?”
- [00:00:35.943]Listening and following directions are
- [00:00:37.927]important skills young children
- [00:00:39.714]must learn.
- [00:00:40.781]There are many reasons why children
- [00:00:42.975]do not follow directions.
- [00:00:44.980]Lisa, what happens when a child
- [00:00:47.172]does not hear the directions?
- [00:00:49.400](Lisa Poppe) Well, parents often give
- [00:00:51.623]directions from a distance or in passing.
- [00:00:53.967]Like, “Lauren, get your shoes on.”
- [00:00:56.481]Did your child actually hear what you said?
- [00:00:59.023]Just as adults often don’t hear what their
- [00:01:01.018]partner has said to them because they are
- [00:01:02.889]focused on reading an email or talking
- [00:01:05.238]on the phone, children too often don’t
- [00:01:07.657]hear what a parent has said because
- [00:01:09.722]they are focused on a task such as
- [00:01:11.814]building a tower or drawing a picture.
- [00:01:14.264](LaDonna Werth) What happens if the parent
- [00:01:16.226]gives too many directions at one time?
- [00:01:18.609](Lisa Poppe) When you give your child too
- [00:01:20.573]many directions at one time,
- [00:01:21.963]it reduces the chance that she
- [00:01:23.902]will follow the directions
- [00:01:25.330]and increases the chance
- [00:01:26.726]that she will be confused.
- [00:01:28.361]“Lauren, please go upstairs,
- [00:01:30.119]brush your teeth and
- [00:01:31.138]pick up your blocks
- [00:01:32.096]while I finish the dishes.”
- [00:01:33.731]This multi-step direction is too long
- [00:01:35.839]and complicated for your child to
- [00:01:37.968]easily understand.
- [00:01:39.274]Instead, try giving only
- [00:01:40.840]one direction at a time.
- [00:01:42.563](LaDonna Werth) I hear parents give
- [00:01:44.867]suggestions instead of directions.
- [00:01:47.412](Lisa Poppe) Daily conversation is filled
- [00:01:49.720]with questions, suggestions and directions.
- [00:01:52.401]When you say,
- [00:01:53.649]“Will you put your shoes away?”
- [00:01:55.758]you are not giving your child a direction
- [00:01:58.286]- you are asking her a question.
- [00:01:59.994]When you give your child a direction
- [00:02:02.073]that needs to be followed,
- [00:02:03.732]it is essential that you tell your child
- [00:02:05.830]what to do rather than ask.
- [00:02:07.838]For example,
- [00:02:08.897]“Lauren, put your shoes by the door."
- [00:02:11.046](LaDonna Werth) It sounds like it is very
- [00:02:13.254]important to follow through when
- [00:02:14.830]you give your child directions.
- [00:02:16.543]A technique you can use to make sure you
- [00:02:18.757]do follow through when your child has
- [00:02:21.367]difficulty complying, or following directions
- [00:02:23.577]is Do-WAWP method.
- [00:02:25.107]Can you explain this to us Lisa?
- [00:02:27.265](Lisa Poppe) Sure the Do-WAWP
- [00:02:29.262]method goes like this:
- [00:02:31.181]» Do—State the “do” direction.
- [00:02:34.891]» W—Wait for compliance (silently count to 5).
- [00:02:39.788]» A—Ask the child to restate the direction.
- [00:02:43.871]» W—Wait for compliance (silently count to 5).
- [00:02:46.757]» and P—Provide encouragement or help
- [00:02:49.613](helping will ensure success)
- [00:02:51.690]This is the Do-WAWP method
- [00:02:53.533]that you can try at home.
- [00:02:55.047](LaDonna Werth) Lisa what is the bottom
- [00:02:56.983]line of giving directions with your children.
- [00:02:59.380](Lisa Poppe) The bottom line is this you
- [00:03:00.892]can increase the chances that your child
- [00:03:03.312]will listen and successfully follow
- [00:03:05.392]your directions when you make
- [00:03:07.175]sure that your direction is
- [00:03:08.920]clearly stated, and
- [00:03:10.239]you follow through.
- [00:03:11.808](LaDonna Werth) This has been LaDonna and
- [00:03:13.805]Lisa with the University of Nebraska-Lincoln.
- [00:03:16.523]Until next time
- [00:03:17.612]enjoy your family time together.
- [00:03:19.931]Fit and Health Kids is a co-production of
- [00:03:22.429]Nebraska Extension, Georgia Extension,
- [00:03:25.002]Kansas State Extension, South Dakota State
- [00:03:27.718]Extension and the Iowa Childcare Resource
- [00:03:30.514]and Referral (with music).
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