Autism: A Personal Perspective
Ryan and DeAnn Foley
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03/16/2021
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31
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Autism: A Personal Perspective
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- [00:00:02.500]Hi.
- [00:00:03.333]My name is Ryan Foley.
- [00:00:05.210]I am the president of Blue Fan, Inc.,
- [00:00:07.741]a nonprofit that presents about various aspects
- [00:00:12.470]of having autism.
- [00:00:15.060]One these aspects, which I will share with you today,
- [00:00:18.700]is the personal perspective,
- [00:00:20.940]where I discuss how having autism has impacted my life
- [00:00:24.750]as well as how I've dealt with
- [00:00:26.600]and overcome some of the challenges of having autism.
- [00:00:34.270]I was 11 months old
- [00:00:36.100]when I developed an interest in oscillating fans.
- [00:00:39.490]I would crawl toward any fan that was the floor in my sight
- [00:00:42.690]and I would turn them on and off
- [00:00:45.243]and watch the blades spin in amazement
- [00:00:47.870]as I pushed each button for each speed.
- [00:00:50.580]I also liked to engage the oscillating mechanism,
- [00:00:53.460]which is on top of the fan,
- [00:00:55.490]and watch the fan oscillate back and forth.
- [00:01:02.120]Since this was a potentially dangerous activity
- [00:01:05.630]and my parents had reason to believe
- [00:01:08.458]I would manipulate any fan with which I had access,
- [00:01:13.018]they taught me the rules on how to use them safely
- [00:01:17.095]so I'd not get my fingers stuck in the cage.
- [00:01:21.070]Since blue is my favorite color,
- [00:01:23.640]most I preferred oscillating fans with blue blades
- [00:01:28.650]like the fan you see behind me.
- [00:01:33.850]I got my first oscillating fan when I was two years old.
- [00:01:39.710]I began collecting fans during my childhood.
- [00:01:45.710]Now, I have a collection of 28 oscillating fans,
- [00:01:49.160]many of which have been given to me
- [00:01:50.410]by friends and relatives,
- [00:01:52.120]and since blue is my favorite color,
- [00:01:56.928]17 of the oscillating fans have blue blades.
- [00:02:02.050]I liked the fans
- [00:02:03.180]because they were easy to control and predictable.
- [00:02:07.160]People on the autism spectrum
- [00:02:08.840]tend to get attached to inanimate objects
- [00:02:10.920]because they are more predictable than people.
- [00:02:16.300]Also as a toddler,
- [00:02:18.042]I liked opening and closing cabinet doors,
- [00:02:20.060]but I outgrew that behavior.
- [00:02:23.840]I have fond memories of my early years
- [00:02:26.200]of being around family members
- [00:02:28.282]and close friends of the family.
- [00:02:29.640]I have fond memories of my early years in general.
- [00:02:34.880]One advantage to having autism
- [00:02:36.440]is that I have very strong memories at two years of age.
- [00:02:45.230]I was afraid of dogs.
- [00:02:47.200]The sound of the dogs barking hurt my ears.
- [00:02:51.584]If you can't imagine the fear I was going through,
- [00:02:52.980]imagine a dog the size of a horse coming up to you
- [00:02:55.860]and barking in your face.
- [00:02:57.330]I'm sure that would put you on edge.
- [00:03:00.380]It was especially scary being eye-level with these dogs.
- [00:03:06.450]As I got taller, my fear of dogs diminished.
- [00:03:13.150]I received auditory retraining when I was eight years old
- [00:03:16.224]and this helped with my sensitivity to sounds.
- [00:03:19.280]By the time I was 13, I got to a point where I liked dogs
- [00:03:23.580]and now I have 120-pound Golden Pyrenees mix named Kira.
- [00:03:28.690]She's gentle and friendly like a golden retriever,
- [00:03:30.950]but stubborn and protective like a Pyrenees.
- [00:03:34.550]She is so big, so she may look like a bear,
- [00:03:36.940]but I will assure you, she is a dog.
- [00:03:42.840]During the first three and a half years of my life,
- [00:03:47.180]my parents and I lived in student housing
- [00:03:50.220]on campus at University of Texas, Arlington,
- [00:03:53.850]where they got their undergraduate degrees.
- [00:03:56.670]In our apartment complex, there was nobody my age
- [00:04:00.300]I could interact with, so when I was three,
- [00:04:02.590]my parents decided to enroll me in a daycare.
- [00:04:06.660]I remember the experience being very overwhelming.
- [00:04:09.950]The staff was uninformed on how to work with me.
- [00:04:13.500]In their defense, in 1988,
- [00:04:16.010]there was not much information available on autism.
- [00:04:20.020]One staff member in particular was mean to me
- [00:04:22.770]as well as other children who went to the daycare.
- [00:04:26.910]Instead of playing with my peers at recess,
- [00:04:29.230]I would stand in front of the AC unit
- [00:04:31.100]and watch the blades spin,
- [00:04:32.330]which was the most comfort I'd get
- [00:04:34.601]in that uncomfortable setting.
- [00:04:38.300]After three weeks, a staff member approached my mom
- [00:04:43.440]and a staff member approached my mom
- [00:04:45.720]and informed her that she'd be starting her own daycare
- [00:04:47.730]out of her house and asked my mom
- [00:04:50.250]if she'd be willing to take me to her house for the day.
- [00:04:52.650]This was not the staff member that was mean to me.
- [00:04:56.380]My mom said yes, so I went to this lady's house for the day
- [00:04:59.077]for the next couple of years,
- [00:05:00.300]which was better than the daycare.
- [00:05:03.808]At five years of age,
- [00:05:05.300]I started kindergarten and was off my own world.
- [00:05:09.970]Instead of paying attention to the teacher,
- [00:05:12.400]I thought about stuff that fascinated me,
- [00:05:14.640]like oscillating fans with blue blades,
- [00:05:16.870]red pickup trucks, and blue flashing lights.
- [00:05:20.100]The teacher informed my parents
- [00:05:21.380]I was having difficulty paying attention.
- [00:05:24.420]My parents had me evaluated
- [00:05:26.410]and I was diagnosed with pervasive developmental disorder,
- [00:05:29.640]not otherwise specified, which was the disorder
- [00:05:32.800]in the DSM-III which best fit my behavioral profile.
- [00:05:38.800]A couple of years later,
- [00:05:39.720]my dad read an article by Lorna Wing on Asperger's syndrome
- [00:05:43.712]and really thought that disorder described me well.
- [00:05:48.310]In 1994, when the DSM-IV came out,
- [00:05:50.890]Asperger's syndrome was included.
- [00:05:54.090]In November 1998,
- [00:05:55.480]when I was 13 years old in the seventh grade,
- [00:05:58.400]my parents and I flew out to New Haven, Connecticut,
- [00:06:01.270]where I was evaluated by Dr. Ami Klin and his team,
- [00:06:04.460]officially receiving the diagnosis of Asperger's syndrome,
- [00:06:07.910]confirming what my parents believed all along.
- [00:06:12.170]As of 2013, Asperger's syndrome was dropped
- [00:06:15.660]from the DSM fifth edition.
- [00:06:17.620]Anyone previously diagnosed now has a diagnosis
- [00:06:21.350]of autism spectrum disorder.
- [00:06:24.150]Shortly before Christmas in my kindergarten year,
- [00:06:27.033]I was placed in a half-day, self-contained classroom
- [00:06:31.300]with a group of boys with various disabilities.
- [00:06:37.490]Early into the spring semester of kindergarten,
- [00:06:40.560]the teacher informed my parents that for the first grade,
- [00:06:43.030]the IEP committee would recommend
- [00:06:44.630]I be placed in behavior unit.
- [00:06:48.120]My parents looked at the behavior unit
- [00:06:49.890]and determined that since I was not a behavior problem,
- [00:06:52.694]this classroom would not be the best fit for me.
- [00:06:57.000]Because my parents rejected me being placed
- [00:07:00.080]in behavior unit,
- [00:07:01.600]I was placed in another self-contained classroom
- [00:07:04.880]with a different group of boys with various disabilities.
- [00:07:08.860]Putting children with autism in the behavior unit
- [00:07:13.273]was routinely what was done with students with autism
- [00:07:17.852]during the early 1990s.
- [00:07:23.290]I had the same teacher
- [00:07:24.410]in that other self-contained classroom
- [00:07:26.040]and basically the same classmates
- [00:07:27.460]for first and second grade.
- [00:07:31.360]This teacher had the best of intentions,
- [00:07:33.800]but was clearly uninformed on how to work
- [00:07:37.200]with a student with autism.
- [00:07:40.510]In her defense, this was the early 1990s
- [00:07:45.260]and there still wasn't very much information available.
- [00:07:49.100]She was very rigid in her teaching approach,
- [00:07:52.210]which consisted of a contract system
- [00:07:53.990]she used for all her students.
- [00:07:56.970]On the contract, there was a list of items
- [00:07:58.760]you're expected to conform to,
- [00:08:00.880]such as doing your work, paying attention,
- [00:08:04.160]getting along with other students and the teacher.
- [00:08:06.870]Conformity resulted in checks next to items conformed to
- [00:08:10.293]and failure to conform resulted in Xs
- [00:08:11.560]next to the items violated.
- [00:08:13.980]Whenever I got one of those red Xs on my contract,
- [00:08:17.410]it made me very angry
- [00:08:18.420]because it felt like a slap in the face.
- [00:08:22.320]This began to dominate my thinking
- [00:08:23.870]throughout first and second grade.
- [00:08:27.080]At the end of second grade, after receiving my last X,
- [00:08:31.470]I thought I'd resolved the issue of the Xs
- [00:08:34.470]until my first semester of junior college,
- [00:08:36.920]when I had a dream that those red Xs were chasing me
- [00:08:40.080]through the supermarket
- [00:08:41.600]and I had to get to the ice cream section
- [00:08:43.770]in order to be safe from those Xs.
- [00:08:46.740]I believe that dream was precipitated
- [00:08:49.410]by the stress of starting junior college.
- [00:08:55.010]I had no dreams about Xs after that.
- [00:09:01.610]In April of my first grade year,
- [00:09:03.720]my mom attended a workshop on autism inclusion.
- [00:09:07.610]During the remainder of my first grade year
- [00:09:10.869]and during the summer prior to second grade,
- [00:09:14.150]my mom continued to research autism inclusion.
- [00:09:17.960]And by the first day of second grade,
- [00:09:20.190]my parents were both convinced
- [00:09:22.230]that my needs would be best served in a regular classroom.
- [00:09:27.350]In first grade, I was in the adaptive PE class,
- [00:09:31.420]but in second grade, I was in a regular PE class
- [00:09:33.990]and I attended a regular science class.
- [00:09:39.480]This is when the transition
- [00:09:41.850]into the regular education classroom started.
- [00:09:45.980]In June, after completing second grade
- [00:09:49.070]in the Dallas-Fort Worth metroplex
- [00:09:50.660]in the self-contained classroom,
- [00:09:52.990]my parents decided that we would move
- [00:09:56.255]from the Dallas-Fort Worth metroplex out to Lubbock
- [00:10:00.750]so that my parents could go to Texas Tech,
- [00:10:02.700]where they got their graduate degrees.
- [00:10:05.700]Before moving,
- [00:10:07.250]my mom called up the special education director
- [00:10:10.020]to see what schools would be the best,
- [00:10:13.230]would be better fits for me and was assured
- [00:10:17.157]that it wouldn't work, no matter what school I attended.
- [00:10:22.470]My parents then traveled out to Lubbock,
- [00:10:24.610]found a place for us to live in a school nearby,
- [00:10:27.230]and upon inquiring to the special education director
- [00:10:30.053]about the school,
- [00:10:32.970]my parents found that they'd made a great choice.
- [00:10:36.860]In August, we made the move out to Lubbock.
- [00:10:40.280]Shortly after, my mom and I went up the new school,
- [00:10:42.970]where the principal gave us a tour.
- [00:10:45.110]He turned out to be a man of integrity
- [00:10:46.950]who ran a great school.
- [00:10:52.738]My parents decided it would be best
- [00:10:55.760]for me to repeat the second grade.
- [00:10:59.330]They thought I would do better with younger students,
- [00:11:02.170]my prior experience with the second grade curriculum
- [00:11:04.853]would make the workload easier,
- [00:11:07.290]and it would be more palatable for the school staff.
- [00:11:12.310]On the first day of second grade
- [00:11:14.530]in the general education classroom, I was very nervous.
- [00:11:20.960]The teacher picked up on it
- [00:11:22.080]and assured me everything would be fine.
- [00:11:24.220]I instantly got a good feeling about her.
- [00:11:26.853]The day went well overall.
- [00:11:32.709]Early into the school year,
- [00:11:35.860]I began to get a very good feeling about my classmates.
- [00:11:41.755]Although I felt comfortable
- [00:11:44.780]with my teacher and my classmates, I was still very nervous
- [00:11:49.840]because it was still a novel situation
- [00:11:52.220]and I was in a new city
- [00:11:54.790]and from time to time during the school year,
- [00:11:58.130]I would chew on my T-shirts
- [00:11:59.720]and come home with them looking like Swiss cheese.
- [00:12:03.370]By the spring of second grade
- [00:12:04.550]in the general education classroom,
- [00:12:06.080]I was able to make it home with my T-shirts intact.
- [00:12:10.560]I continued to find my experience
- [00:12:14.294]in the general education classroom to be far superior
- [00:12:18.370]to what I had experienced in the previous school district.
- [00:12:22.690]In the Dallas-Fort Worth metroplex,
- [00:12:24.290]I attended three different schools, one of them twice,
- [00:12:27.570]and three additional schools during the summer.
- [00:12:30.340]This is not because we moved.
- [00:12:32.800]We moved only once during that time period
- [00:12:35.870]and that was a week after the end of first grade
- [00:12:38.827]and this did not change where I would go for second grade.
- [00:12:43.430]It was because the school district kept moving the program
- [00:12:46.360]for the self-contained classroom around from year to year.
- [00:12:50.400]I was relieved at the end of second grade
- [00:12:53.126]in the general education classroom when my mom informed me
- [00:12:58.330]that I would be going to the same school the following year,
- [00:13:00.900]and I would continue with that school
- [00:13:04.353]until the completion of sixth grade,
- [00:13:05.708]when I went off to junior high.
- [00:13:10.430]I found my experience
- [00:13:12.630]or I found the general education teachers
- [00:13:14.940]to be more accommodating, more caring,
- [00:13:17.970]and more willing to try different things to meet my needs.
- [00:13:22.440]The self-contained classroom teacher
- [00:13:24.070]attempted to stifle my special interests.
- [00:13:30.110]I believe it was in her thinking
- [00:13:32.930]that was her job to make me normal.
- [00:13:36.100]The general education teachers
- [00:13:37.570]were supportive of my interests.
- [00:13:39.660]In content mastery, I earned time to sit
- [00:13:41.410]in front of a big oscillating fan with blue blades
- [00:13:43.766]when I got my work done and my teachers used other interests
- [00:13:49.060]of mine as motivators, as well.
- [00:13:52.820]In their thinking, although I had a learning disability,
- [00:13:56.240]they found that I needed what all the other students needed
- [00:13:59.260]and gave me those needed things
- [00:14:01.680]as well as the needed accommodations.
- [00:14:08.150]These teachers also had little experience with autism,
- [00:14:12.085]but they had very good intuition when it came to me.
- [00:14:20.010]In the self-contained classroom, I developed relationships.
- [00:14:25.050]I developed relationships with few of the children,
- [00:14:28.550]one of which being a boy that I would hang out with.
- [00:14:35.650]The other relationships that I developed
- [00:14:39.659]were not very strong.
- [00:14:44.725]In the general education classroom,
- [00:14:46.120]I developed relationships with several of my classmates,
- [00:14:49.040]both boys and girls, and for the most part,
- [00:14:52.470]my classmates were very accepting of me
- [00:14:54.860]and protected me from bullying, being bullied.
- [00:15:01.845]I developed lasting relationships with my classmates,
- [00:15:05.960]most of which ended at the end of sixth grade,
- [00:15:11.350]after which point we all went off to different junior highs.
- [00:15:14.370]I started a friendship with a classmate, his sister,
- [00:15:16.750]and his parents starting at the beginning of third grade,
- [00:15:21.160]which continued until the summer before ninth grade.
- [00:15:24.760]During that summer before ninth grade,
- [00:15:27.640]the family moved out of state.
- [00:15:31.850]I developed relationships with several of the teachers
- [00:15:34.160]outside of school, my speech therapist, her family,
- [00:15:37.520]my former fifth grade teacher and her family,
- [00:15:39.320]as well as my former third grade teacher
- [00:15:42.050]and some other teachers.
- [00:15:45.023]Maintaining these friendships was a great sense of support
- [00:15:48.300]for me while I was in junior high.
- [00:15:52.590]Being at the same school in the general education classroom
- [00:15:56.870]was this sense of support and belonging
- [00:15:59.400]that I had not been afforded
- [00:16:00.740]in the Dallas-Fort Worth metroplex.
- [00:16:04.450]My transition to junior high began
- [00:16:06.310]in April of my sixth grade year
- [00:16:08.630]when the teacher sent me out to the hall
- [00:16:11.030]to meet with the principal and the school counselor
- [00:16:14.863]of the junior high I would go to the following year.
- [00:16:21.540]In late April and early May of sixth grade,
- [00:16:25.000]my mom and I went up to the junior high,
- [00:16:27.610]where the principal and school counselor gave us a tour.
- [00:16:32.240]One week prior to the last day of sixth grade,
- [00:16:35.200]my mom and the special education director arranged a meeting
- [00:16:39.045]where the junior high staff could meet
- [00:16:41.460]with the elementary school staff
- [00:16:43.200]and ask them questions about how I learned
- [00:16:45.820]and the elementary school staff
- [00:16:47.910]could answer those questions.
- [00:16:49.780]The junior high staff commented later
- [00:16:51.640]on how helpful this was.
- [00:16:55.100]In late July, my mom and I went up to the school
- [00:16:57.400]for a third time, and this time,
- [00:16:58.870]I was most excited to meet a couple of the cheerleaders.
- [00:17:02.220]One of these cheerleaders took me under her wing
- [00:17:04.240]during my seventh grade year.
- [00:17:09.105]In early August, I began volunteering with other students
- [00:17:14.290]and the teacher to help get the school ready
- [00:17:16.810]and I began walking through my class schedule.
- [00:17:19.460]Volunteering to help get the school ready
- [00:17:21.822]and walking through my class schedule was a ritual
- [00:17:26.280]before starting seventh, eighth, and ninth grades.
- [00:17:35.002]The first day of seventh grade was very stressful,
- [00:17:38.440]but I did not get lost once.
- [00:17:41.420]A ninth-grade student was assigned to help me around school
- [00:17:45.083]and at lunchtime, he came back to the counselor's office
- [00:17:48.330]in a panic, thinking he'd lost me,
- [00:17:50.990]when what actually happened is I had just gotten tired
- [00:17:53.960]of waiting on him and gone off to lunch.
- [00:17:58.310]The counselor could barely contain her laughter
- [00:18:00.240]at the end of the day when my mom came to pick me up
- [00:18:03.398]and she was relaying the story.
- [00:18:09.680]The first few months of junior high were very stressful
- [00:18:12.040]and I really missed my elementary school,
- [00:18:14.472]but I was glad to still have friendships
- [00:18:18.734]with the teachers from that school, as well as my friends
- [00:18:22.570]that I'd known since the third grade.
- [00:18:27.820]A week prior to Thanksgiving break,
- [00:18:30.690]my parents and I flew out to New Haven, Connecticut
- [00:18:34.580]for my evaluation at Yale University.
- [00:18:38.540]Having a week off for the evaluation at Yale
- [00:18:41.556]and the next week off for Thanksgiving break
- [00:18:46.560]greatly reduced my anxiety and allowed me time to regroup.
- [00:18:54.850]I returned to school after Thanksgiving break
- [00:18:57.660]comfortable in the junior high setting.
- [00:19:03.820]In January, after returning to school from Christmas break,
- [00:19:14.240]I found I was doing better
- [00:19:15.160]than I ever had in my entire life.
- [00:19:18.290]I had increased self-confidence.
- [00:19:21.156]I had become interested in girls, particularly at that time,
- [00:19:25.220]that cheerleader who had taken me under her wing.
- [00:19:28.500]Associating with girls added a dimension of excitement
- [00:19:31.900]and meaning to my life that it did not have before.
- [00:19:37.480]In March of seventh grade, I became interested in 80s music,
- [00:19:41.420]particularly the early 1980s music.
- [00:19:45.210]Early 80s music was more effective in reducing my anxiety
- [00:19:49.320]than things I tried in the past.
- [00:19:52.980]In September, when I was 14 years old in eighth grade,
- [00:19:57.060]my parents started a social skills group,
- [00:19:59.592]which was held at a place called The Parenting Cottage.
- [00:20:05.800]The social skills group consisted of adolescents,
- [00:20:08.280]pre-adolescents, and young adults
- [00:20:10.442]with various learning disabilities.
- [00:20:13.840]The Parenting Cottage was a place in the community
- [00:20:16.430]that served children with various learning disabilities
- [00:20:21.720]and helped their parents out, as well.
- [00:20:24.020]The Parenting Cottage was not a typical office building,
- [00:20:27.663]but instead looked and felt more like a home.
- [00:20:31.810]The waiting room was like a living room.
- [00:20:34.840]You had a dining room, kitchen,
- [00:20:35.970]and the offices were like rooms in the house.
- [00:20:41.650]The spring that I turned nine in second grade
- [00:20:45.823]was when I started receiving occupational therapy
- [00:20:49.210]at The Parenting Cottage.
- [00:20:52.170]During the spring of seventh grade,
- [00:20:54.380]my dad started seeing clients out of The Parenting Cottage
- [00:20:57.844]as he was a counselor.
- [00:21:02.470]So I was very familiar with the place
- [00:21:04.510]by the time the social skills group started.
- [00:21:09.030]In February, the social skills group grew
- [00:21:13.120]and a 14-year-old girl joining the group
- [00:21:16.580]that I really took a liking to
- [00:21:18.670]and the group became more fun when she joined.
- [00:21:23.520]By March, The Parenting Cottage had taken on the role.
- [00:21:28.084]The Parenting Cottage had become like a second home
- [00:21:32.800]and the people there became like a second family.
- [00:21:38.790]My peers in the social skills group were like cousins.
- [00:21:45.630]Their parents were like aunts and uncles.
- [00:21:50.960]My occupational therapist became like an aunt
- [00:21:53.180]and Beth, who was the elderly lady
- [00:21:54.890]who worked at the front desk, was like a grandma.
- [00:21:59.980]So for during the spring of eighth grade
- [00:22:03.180]and all through ninth grade, as well as a little bit after,
- [00:22:05.470]no matter how stressful things got,
- [00:22:07.696]I always had one day a week
- [00:22:09.642]where I could go to The Parenting College,
- [00:22:11.440]be with the social skills group,
- [00:22:13.060]and all my stresses would be outside the front door.
- [00:22:18.600]This picture that you see was taken
- [00:22:23.780]during the Garland City 4th of July Festival, 2000.
- [00:22:28.570]At this time, I was 15 years old
- [00:22:30.297]and this was summer break, prior to ninth grade
- [00:22:33.810]and these are the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders.
- [00:22:36.580]My mom and I flew from Lubbock to the Dallas area
- [00:22:40.280]to visit relatives
- [00:22:42.180]and my grandfather was on the state council,
- [00:22:44.300]so we had access to the VIP area.
- [00:22:46.920]That is how I managed to get my picture taken here.
- [00:22:50.580]I blew my photo up on a binder for my ninth grade year
- [00:22:55.490]and guys were asking me about this.
- [00:22:58.550]Junior high was not all roses,
- [00:23:02.450]like I may have led you to believe.
- [00:23:06.830]Here are some of the negative aspects.
- [00:23:09.460]High stress, which is part of the hormonal changes
- [00:23:11.800]going on through puberty, as well as some depression.
- [00:23:17.490]I was worried about fitting in
- [00:23:20.240]and not only learning the school curriculum
- [00:23:21.920]and following the school rules,
- [00:23:23.350]but learning the unspoken social norms of my peers
- [00:23:25.980]and following them as well and avoiding being bullied.
- [00:23:31.920]I was rarely bullied, and when I was,
- [00:23:35.030]it was very minor verbal bullying.
- [00:23:37.200]Most of the students at that school were good people
- [00:23:39.320]who did not engage in bullying.
- [00:23:41.520]When I got bullied, I would stick up for myself,
- [00:23:44.450]friends would stick for me, or I would tell my mom.
- [00:23:46.920]My mom would go mother bear and she would call up the school
- [00:23:51.180]and believe me, when my mom called up the school,
- [00:23:53.860]the bullying was taken care of.
- [00:23:59.270]The most difficult part was heartbreak from girls.
- [00:24:02.860]When I was 14 and in the eighth grade, my mom warned me
- [00:24:06.793]that the only good thing about teenage girls
- [00:24:08.940]is that they grew out of being teenagers
- [00:24:10.580]and that I was a glutton for punishment
- [00:24:13.282]for associating with them, and sure enough, she was right.
- [00:24:17.380]After seventh grade,
- [00:24:18.830]that cheerleader who had taken me under her wing
- [00:24:20.720]as well as another ninth-grade girl
- [00:24:23.520]that I enjoyed talking to went off to high school,
- [00:24:26.442]leaving me really heartbroken.
- [00:24:30.300]So, during the summer before eighth grade,
- [00:24:33.590]I called up a girl who was in my crafts class
- [00:24:36.140]during seventh grade.
- [00:24:38.610]My mom, her mom, her, and I got together.
- [00:24:41.870]And during the summer,
- [00:24:43.680]this girl and I hung out and played tennis together.
- [00:24:47.440]In August, when eighth grade started,
- [00:24:50.540]she started giving me indications
- [00:24:52.430]that she was not interested
- [00:24:53.620]in being my friend outside of school,
- [00:24:55.860]but I continued to remain hopeful
- [00:24:58.920]that we would resume our friendship, until November,
- [00:25:01.680]when it became more clear, which really hurt me.
- [00:25:06.750]In January, after months of giving me the cold shoulder,
- [00:25:10.770]she started talking to me again, which renewed my sense
- [00:25:13.920]of hope of us starting a friendship outside of school.
- [00:25:20.050]In April of my eighth grade year,
- [00:25:21.810]as my 15th birthday approached, still,
- [00:25:25.210]nothing happened with this other girl,
- [00:25:27.020]with this girl I played tennis with
- [00:25:28.830]during the summer before.
- [00:25:31.190]However, I had realized that there was another girl
- [00:25:36.170]I'd been talking to who was more receptive to me,
- [00:25:42.370]so I began to develop an interest in this other girl.
- [00:25:48.640]When I woke up on my 15th birthday in May,
- [00:25:50.770]I'd moved on from my tennis partner the previous summer
- [00:25:53.500]and was interested in having a friendship
- [00:25:56.920]with this other girl outside of school,
- [00:25:59.320]but that didn't happen.
- [00:26:01.620]But throughout the spring of eighth grade,
- [00:26:04.850]I was enjoying my friendship
- [00:26:07.810]with that girl in my parents' social skills group
- [00:26:11.000]and during the summer before ninth grade when I was 15
- [00:26:13.580]and into the beginning of ninth grade,
- [00:26:15.330]I still continued to enjoy my friendship with this girl.
- [00:26:18.900]Ninth grade got off to a great start,
- [00:26:21.830]but in October, things took a downturn again
- [00:26:26.922]when that girl left the social skills group,
- [00:26:30.084]which really saddened me.
- [00:26:35.950]Also in October, I realized that
- [00:26:37.730]since my friends from the third grade
- [00:26:40.980]had moved out of state during the previous summer,
- [00:26:43.550]I really didn't have very many friends at school
- [00:26:46.490]and I felt like the social skills group was all I had.
- [00:26:53.990]Also in October of my ninth grade year,
- [00:26:56.550]school became very overwhelming
- [00:27:00.110]and I began to struggle academically.
- [00:27:02.990]Over Christmas break, my parents decided
- [00:27:06.200]that they would probably homeschool me after ninth grade.
- [00:27:11.850]They were confident they could teach me in a way
- [00:27:13.610]that could prepare me for college
- [00:27:15.640]and it would allow more social opportunities with my peers
- [00:27:18.060]as well as more time to work on social skills.
- [00:27:22.140]Dr. Ami Klin at Yale University informed my parents
- [00:27:26.803]that I had a lifetime to learn academics,
- [00:27:31.800]but I had a limited opportunity to learn social skills.
- [00:27:36.070]Also, they had heard of students like me
- [00:27:39.580]getting bullied relentlessly in public high school
- [00:27:42.820]and they were determined to keep the bullying to a minimum.
- [00:27:48.750]In January, when I returned to school from Christmas break,
- [00:27:53.100]things were going well again.
- [00:27:55.931]I had moved on from that girl
- [00:27:57.670]in my parents' social skills group
- [00:27:59.420]and I began enjoying the social skills group more again.
- [00:28:04.924]The schoolwork was manageable
- [00:28:07.050]and my parents informed me of their intentions
- [00:28:08.970]to homeschool me after ninth grade and their reasons why
- [00:28:13.894]and I really liked the idea of being homeschooled
- [00:28:15.560]after ninth grade because I was not looking forward
- [00:28:18.500]to going through the stress of transitioning
- [00:28:20.180]to another school for 10th grade.
- [00:28:23.560]In February, the workload became difficult to manage again,
- [00:28:27.974]but when spring break came in March,
- [00:28:32.090]I knew that I was not gonna have to deal with the stress
- [00:28:34.330]of public school much longer
- [00:28:36.400]and my stress level went down greatly.
- [00:28:40.080]Also, over spring break,
- [00:28:41.960]I began to develop an interest in a girl
- [00:28:43.880]who was in the same PE class and same English class as me.
- [00:28:49.030]She had a sense that I had some learning disability,
- [00:28:52.150]although she didn't know I had autism,
- [00:28:54.220]and she took me under her wing
- [00:28:56.740]and would stick up for me if I got bullied.
- [00:29:02.160]I returned to school after spring break
- [00:29:03.830]feeling renewed and confident
- [00:29:05.340]I could take on the last stretch of the school year.
- [00:29:10.140]The last part of the school year went well,
- [00:29:12.370]as did the beginning of the school year,
- [00:29:14.620]except for one incident in my English class on Friday,
- [00:29:19.960]three weeks before the last day of school
- [00:29:22.860]when I got teased in my English class
- [00:29:24.720]with the teacher present.
- [00:29:27.420]She was unaware of the teasing.
- [00:29:29.140]Otherwise, she would have put a stop to it.
- [00:29:33.760]I left school that Friday
- [00:29:34.980]afraid to return to school the following Monday
- [00:29:38.060]and I was relieved that only had three more weeks
- [00:29:39.723]to have to deal with this.
- [00:29:41.910]This was very telling of what I could expect to experience
- [00:29:45.510]if I went on to public high school.
- [00:29:48.960]I told my parents about what happened.
- [00:29:51.660]My dad gave me suggestions on how to handle further bullying
- [00:29:55.170]and my mom went mother bear and called up the teacher
- [00:30:00.495]and I'm sure the teacher took care of it the next week.
- [00:30:03.440]Over the weekend, I had my 16th birthday
- [00:30:06.133]and I returned to school the following Monday,
- [00:30:08.700]having recovered from the bullying incident.
- [00:30:10.910]The last three weeks went without incident.
- [00:30:13.830]When the last bell rang on the last day of school,
- [00:30:16.450]I felt a sense of freedom.
- [00:30:20.780]Overall, the good aspects of junior high outweighed the bad.
- [00:30:24.640]The bad was nothing that I couldn't handle
- [00:30:26.714]and I always had a sense of support to fall back on,
- [00:30:30.673]whether it was my teachers from the elementary school,
- [00:30:37.750]my friends from the third grade, seventh and eighth grade,
- [00:30:41.440]or The Parenting Cottage and social skills group.
- [00:30:45.550]I can remember one thing that happened every week
- [00:30:48.820]from the first day of seventh grade
- [00:30:51.680]to the last day of ninth grade.
- [00:30:57.980]In June, after having completed the ninth grade,
- [00:31:02.360]I began working on the 10th grade curriculum at home.
- [00:31:06.750]I found that homeschooling worked for me
- [00:31:09.060]because I had become self-motivated to complete my work.
- [00:31:12.450]The pressure of deadlines was gone
- [00:31:15.800]and it did allow more social opportunities with my peers.
- [00:31:20.610]A week after the end of ninth grade,
- [00:31:22.450]my mom and I joined a Scottish country dance group
- [00:31:24.380]and there were several adolescents there.
- [00:31:27.983]Within three weeks after starting the group,
- [00:31:31.606]I found my peers in the Scottish country dance group
- [00:31:35.940]be more accepting of me than they were in junior high.
- [00:31:40.770]A boy, two girls, and I would go skating
- [00:31:43.950]at a roller skating rink after dance lessons.
- [00:31:50.990]In July of 2001, when I was 16,
- [00:31:54.230]being homeschooled for 10th grade,
- [00:31:56.090]my parents informed me of their intention
- [00:31:58.900]for us to move from Lubbock
- [00:32:00.960]back to the Dallas-Fort Worth metroplex to be around family.
- [00:32:06.920]The big push for my dad was that my paternal grandfather
- [00:32:09.670]was in his eighties at the time and we did not know
- [00:32:12.630]how much longer he was gonna be alive,
- [00:32:14.490]so my dad wanted us to get back to the Dallas area
- [00:32:17.326]so that we could spend whatever time he had left with him.
- [00:32:21.190]He lived just outside of Dallas.
- [00:32:25.726]In September, we made the move
- [00:32:28.270]back to the Dallas-Fort Worth metroplex.
- [00:32:31.400]Being homeschooled reduced the stress
- [00:32:33.660]of the transition greatly.
- [00:32:36.690]I could not handle starting at another school
- [00:32:40.110]after having left my friends behind in Lubbock.
- [00:32:46.030]This also allowed me time to go out to Lubbock with my dad
- [00:32:52.440]every other week while he was seeing clients out there
- [00:32:56.290]so I could see my friends out there,
- [00:32:59.250]and I did this until November of that year.
- [00:33:04.260]Also in November, when I was 16,
- [00:33:06.240]homeschooled for 10th grade,
- [00:33:08.020]I joined a group called the Explorers.
- [00:33:10.580]They're a group of teenagers
- [00:33:12.130]that train through the fire department
- [00:33:14.140]and learn how to do stuff that firefighters do
- [00:33:16.670]like cut up cars, climb the fire ladder,
- [00:33:19.210]and fight an actual fire.
- [00:33:21.150]I found my peers in the Explorers
- [00:33:23.150]to be more accepting of me than they were in junior high
- [00:33:27.850]and I have reason to believe
- [00:33:28.683]they would have been in public high school
- [00:33:30.810]and there was nobody in this group I did not get along with.
- [00:33:36.060]This picture was taken on Saturday, December the first, 2001
- [00:33:39.860]at the Dallas Firefighter Training Academy.
- [00:33:42.567]This is the burn building.
- [00:33:45.530]Trainees go into this building
- [00:33:48.750]and they learn how to fight an actual fire.
- [00:33:52.070]My team and I went in there and we hosed down a real fire.
- [00:33:55.130]I'm the guy in the middle, by the way.
- [00:33:58.350]While I was in there, my mask began to vibrate,
- [00:34:01.070]which meant I was running out of oxygen
- [00:34:03.010]and I needed to get out of there as quickly as possible
- [00:34:08.280]in order not to endanger myself,
- [00:34:10.800]the other Explorers, or the firefighters.
- [00:34:14.690]When I took my mask off, a firefighter checked out,
- [00:34:17.880]determined it was defective,
- [00:34:19.280]and told my team I did exactly what I was supposed to do.
- [00:34:23.490]A couple of hours later,
- [00:34:25.070]we went to a chamber called the flashover chamber,
- [00:34:27.670]where trainees learned to fight flash fires.
- [00:34:30.790]A flash fire is a fire that shoots up the wall of a room
- [00:34:33.540]and across the ceiling.
- [00:34:35.845]It may appear to go over your head,
- [00:34:37.788]but if you come out of there alive
- [00:34:39.548]and you live and you're able to talk about it,
- [00:34:43.000]it only appeared to go over your head.
- [00:34:44.910]If it goes over your head, you're dead.
- [00:34:48.690]All life plans canceled.
- [00:34:51.470]Unlike the fire in the burn building,
- [00:34:54.040]the flash fire had a mind of its own,
- [00:34:56.800]where it would start shooting up the wall in the room
- [00:34:59.010]and across the ceiling and we'd spray the top of the flame
- [00:35:01.300]and it would back off.
- [00:35:03.210]This happened several times.
- [00:35:08.570]With these fires, you start at the top of the flame
- [00:35:11.680]and you work your way down to the base.
- [00:35:14.300]With a typical fire,
- [00:35:15.200]you just aim right at the base to put out,
- [00:35:17.500]but with a flash fire, the heat from the fire
- [00:35:20.389]and the humidity from the water
- [00:35:21.690]can scald you if you do that.
- [00:35:27.193]That fire was so hot, it melted my face mask.
- [00:35:31.020]I crawled out of the flashover chamber that day
- [00:35:33.130]feeling like a hero
- [00:35:34.570]and when I took my firefighting gear off,
- [00:35:37.252]although it was a cold December day, it felt like April.
- [00:35:40.830]Was I frightened in there?
- [00:35:42.330]Absolutely.
- [00:35:44.590]Fear is what motivates you do what you need to do
- [00:35:48.140]to stay alive in these situations.
- [00:35:51.710]Too much fear can be debilitating,
- [00:35:53.660]while with too little fear,
- [00:35:55.410]you may do something reckless and get yourself burnt.
- [00:35:59.270]In fact, if you experienced one of these flash fires
- [00:36:02.850]and you're not afraid,
- [00:36:03.683]I suggest you get yourself checked out
- [00:36:06.290]'cause there's obviously something wrong with you.
- [00:36:11.980]A year and a half before starting junior college,
- [00:36:14.340]my parents started hiring student speech therapists
- [00:36:16.640]to work with me on my social skills
- [00:36:18.150]and help me with my transition to college.
- [00:36:20.890]Aside from them being attractive females in their twenties,
- [00:36:23.671]they provided me a great sense of emotional support.
- [00:36:30.000]Turning 18, entering adulthood was very stressful.
- [00:36:37.271]A couple of these ladies took me up to the campus
- [00:36:40.650]so I would become familiar with it.
- [00:36:44.060]I went to Disability Services,
- [00:36:45.960]began walking through my class schedule,
- [00:36:47.640]and got my books early.
- [00:36:50.890]This is where I learned self-advocacy.
- [00:36:53.780]I would discuss the needed accommodations
- [00:36:56.681]with a disability service counselor
- [00:36:58.440]who would print the accommodations out on a document,
- [00:37:00.610]which I would hand to instructors
- [00:37:02.518]on the first day of classes.
- [00:37:06.970]The accommodations were a laptop for taking notes,
- [00:37:10.170]extended time on tests,
- [00:37:12.180]and a reduced-distraction environment
- [00:37:13.700]for taking these tests.
- [00:37:16.360]For the most part, I was pretty self-sufficient,
- [00:37:18.360]but sometimes my parents did have to intervene
- [00:37:20.400]to get me the needed accommodations.
- [00:37:23.560]Other strategies were running,
- [00:37:24.800]which cleared my head so I could think better.
- [00:37:27.020]I liked to get my work done
- [00:37:28.761]a week or two ahead of the syllabus
- [00:37:30.379]and by the time the project was due,
- [00:37:32.320]be working on what came after it.
- [00:37:36.020]I went in for tutoring,
- [00:37:37.140]looked up my professors on ratemyprofessor.com,
- [00:37:39.810]and limited the amount of hours I took each semester.
- [00:37:44.400]I graduated with an associate's degree in science
- [00:37:46.840]and did an online course format
- [00:37:48.410]for my junior and senior year.
- [00:37:50.750]This provided greater flexibility in my daily schedule
- [00:37:53.401]and allowed me time to train for and run marathons
- [00:37:56.540]and also allowed me to go out
- [00:37:57.630]and interact with my neighbors,
- [00:37:59.130]which was a great sense of emotional support for me.
- [00:38:03.210]I graduated with a bachelor's degree in general studies
- [00:38:07.470]with an emphasis in sociology and criminal justice.
- [00:38:11.620]Here is a list of interventions that helped along the way.
- [00:38:15.230]Now, social autopsy,
- [00:38:18.120]this is where you discuss with somebody you're working
- [00:38:20.330]with what they did well and what they can improve upon
- [00:38:23.823]so the next interaction goes better.
- [00:38:25.400]I learned this from (indistinct) video in January 2003
- [00:38:29.120]when I was 17, homeschooled for 11th grade.
- [00:38:35.280]Pausing movies and TV shows is another great intervention
- [00:38:40.121]so that I could read the nonverbal messages
- [00:38:45.420]the characters are trying to convey.
- [00:38:47.690]I did equine therapy from the summer when I was 13
- [00:38:51.130]till the summer when I was 16.
- [00:38:52.850]This helped with coordination, self-confidence,
- [00:38:55.320]and was a great social outlet for me.
- [00:38:59.460]I competed in a couple of competitions
- [00:39:01.420]the summer when I was 15, winning second place.
- [00:39:06.810]I also did speech therapy.
- [00:39:09.480]As I mentioned before,
- [00:39:10.970]the speech therapist at my elementary school in Lubbock
- [00:39:14.517]was a great sense of emotional support for me.
- [00:39:17.620]I developed a great relationship with her and her family.
- [00:39:22.930]Shortly after turning 14, at the end of seventh grade,
- [00:39:25.900]I started seeing another speech therapist outside of school
- [00:39:29.117]and in February, my eighth grade year,
- [00:39:31.960]she began working with my parents' social skills group.
- [00:39:35.030]She took on a role of an aunt, her son was like a cousin,
- [00:39:37.740]and her husband was like an uncle.
- [00:39:43.900]And when I was 17, 18, and 19 years old,
- [00:39:49.260]I was seeing those student speech therapists,
- [00:39:51.470]who again, provided me a great sense of emotional support.
- [00:39:56.800]As I mentioned before, the spring that I turned nine
- [00:40:00.190]when I was in second grade, I began developing occupational
- [00:40:04.180]or I began doing occupational therapy, sensory integration
- [00:40:13.760]and over the years, developed a great relationship
- [00:40:16.420]with the occupational therapist.
- [00:40:20.160]When I was 14, in the eighth grade,
- [00:40:21.590]when the social skills group grew,
- [00:40:23.337]the occupational therapist
- [00:40:24.830]began to take on the role of an aunt.
- [00:40:30.060]I will say my equine therapists, that speech therapist
- [00:40:33.839]who worked with my parents' social skills group,
- [00:40:34.967]and the occupational therapist
- [00:40:36.790]took on the role of counselors that I could talk to
- [00:40:39.010]when I was going through the stresses of junior high,
- [00:40:40.820]particularly dealing with those girls.
- [00:40:45.540]I also did Taekwondo from when I was 11 to 13
- [00:40:48.710]and I did aquatic therapy from when I was 11 to 14.
- [00:40:56.340]I also had a massage therapist who came in twice a week
- [00:41:02.280]to work on me until the COVID got really bad.
- [00:41:05.360]After I get my second vaccination,
- [00:41:07.337]I will start resuming services with her.
- [00:41:15.510]As you probably know,
- [00:41:16.640]people on the autism spectrum have special interests.
- [00:41:19.460]Mine are (indistinct) oscillating fans with blue blades.
- [00:41:24.520]This is my nine-inch Lasko oscillating guest fan
- [00:41:29.870]with cobalt blue blades.
- [00:41:31.260]This blades are my favorite shade of blue.
- [00:41:35.290]This fan was manufactured in 1980 or 1981.
- [00:41:40.870]I believe it was 1980.
- [00:41:44.180]Throughout the 70s and into the early 1980s,
- [00:41:47.570]Lasko as well as many other manufacturers
- [00:41:51.001]made these oscillating fans with the blue blades.
- [00:41:57.310]In 1982, Lasko discontinued the blue blades,
- [00:42:04.250]but other manufacturers continue to make them
- [00:42:06.921]with the blue blades after that.
- [00:42:13.090]This fan in particular is my favorite fan
- [00:42:15.820]because it looks just like that fan I got
- [00:42:17.800]when I was two years old.
- [00:42:21.290]The fan that I got when I was two years old
- [00:42:22.930]broke shortly after I turned four.
- [00:42:25.950]Not knowing the importance of it, my dad got rid of it.
- [00:42:30.030]But when I was 18, I ran into an elderly lady
- [00:42:33.730]who had this fan and she gave it to me,
- [00:42:36.570]so now I have a replacement for the fan
- [00:42:39.333]that I had when I was a toddler and it brings back memories
- [00:42:42.010]of being two and three years old.
- [00:42:44.290]I have many other oscillating fans like this
- [00:42:46.840]made in the early 80s with the blue blades.
- [00:42:50.810]Lightning and thunderstorms
- [00:42:52.590]is another special interest of mine,
- [00:42:54.870]which started out a fear.
- [00:42:58.930]As a child, I was afraid of thunderstorms,
- [00:43:03.920]but the spring that I turned 12,
- [00:43:07.279]I began to become interested in them
- [00:43:10.740]and when I was 12, I began researching them
- [00:43:12.070]and learned what to do and not to do
- [00:43:13.420]to stay safe during a thunderstorm.
- [00:43:17.150]Researching thunderstorms reduced my fear
- [00:43:22.280]and enhanced my interest in them
- [00:43:28.870]and I enjoy a big storm with lots of lightning to this day,
- [00:43:32.570]so long as I'm not outside in it
- [00:43:34.300]and as long as there aren't any tornadoes.
- [00:43:40.010]It is not uncommon for people on the autism spectrum
- [00:43:44.380]to research their fears to overcome their fears
- [00:43:49.080]and through researching their fears,
- [00:43:50.380]they turn their fears into special interests.
- [00:43:55.360]A third one of mine is abnormal psychology.
- [00:43:58.690]For six and a half months after having moved from Lubbock,
- [00:44:02.070]I was in denial about having left my friends behind.
- [00:44:04.280]Then reality sunk in.
- [00:44:07.780]Eight months after we moved, my grandfather passed away
- [00:44:14.238]and this was days after my 17th birthday
- [00:44:17.450]and he had been a great sense of emotional support for me
- [00:44:19.670]after I'd moved from Lubbock.
- [00:44:24.810]I began to think I was developing a mood disorder,
- [00:44:30.700]so I began asking my dad about various mental disorders
- [00:44:34.240]since he has his doctorate in counseling psychology.
- [00:44:38.440]After a brief discussion of the mental disorders,
- [00:44:41.720]my dad showed me the DSM-IV,
- [00:44:43.410]which was in his office and I began reading it.
- [00:44:48.740]And I read about various mental disorders,
- [00:44:50.360]such as schizophrenia, bipolar, sociopathy,
- [00:44:52.820]and autism, to name a few.
- [00:44:55.190]This became my way of understanding human behavior
- [00:44:57.960]and enhanced my critical thinking skills.
- [00:45:00.720]Over the years, I continued to do further research
- [00:45:05.290]on various mental disorders through other books
- [00:45:08.110]and I have gotten the DSM-V and began reading through that
- [00:45:12.559]and the DSM-V is very similar to the DSM-IV,
- [00:45:17.920]but yet a little bit different.
- [00:45:21.250]I like 80s music, particularly early 80s music,
- [00:45:26.080]and cardiovascular exercise is another interest of mine,
- [00:45:29.710]which I'll go into a little bit later.
- [00:45:33.400]What helps me manage these circumscribed interests
- [00:45:35.530]is my desire to know how the other person's been,
- [00:45:38.990]about the other person and the guilt I feel
- [00:45:41.450]if the conversation ends
- [00:45:42.590]with me not asking another person how they've been
- [00:45:46.521]and them not getting to talk about themselves.
- [00:45:51.490]Just talking about myself after a while
- [00:45:53.330]starts to feel unsettling.
- [00:45:57.070]Here's some anxiety indicators.
- [00:45:59.540]I have a lot of nervous energy.
- [00:46:01.580]I will talk a lot about my interests.
- [00:46:03.830]I may have pressure or fast-paced speech
- [00:46:06.250]and I may pace back and forth.
- [00:46:10.290]Here is how I reduce my anxiety.
- [00:46:12.440]Listening to early 1980s music, massage therapy,
- [00:46:16.070]commuting with my dog, Kira, medication,
- [00:46:19.320]hanging out with my neighbors,
- [00:46:21.561]which many of them are my friends,
- [00:46:24.639]and cardiovascular exercise.
- [00:46:30.860]For years, I've run 11 and a half to 12 miles a day
- [00:46:34.630]and I have run a couple of marathons.
- [00:46:40.690]I tried to do the White Rock Lake Marathon,
- [00:46:45.103]but I did not hydrate properly
- [00:46:47.870]and I became sick from dehydration after 24 miles.
- [00:46:55.080]Months later, I attempted the Big D Marathon,
- [00:47:00.850]but it was unseasonably warm
- [00:47:02.410]and after 13 miles, became sick because of heat exhaustion.
- [00:47:07.300]So I plotted a path in my neighborhood
- [00:47:09.890]and a week and a half later, successfully ran the 26.2 miles
- [00:47:14.190]in my neighborhood, finishing it from my house.
- [00:47:18.630]Months later, I did another marathon in my neighborhood
- [00:47:21.620]and I made a 26 and a half miles,
- [00:47:25.060]which was three-tenths a mile longer than the marathon mark.
- [00:47:31.370]Completing both these marathons
- [00:47:32.850]gave me a sense of accomplishment and peace.
- [00:47:39.820]I cannot run as much as I used to
- [00:47:41.330]because I have a hamstring problem
- [00:47:42.670]and I'm getting that fixed through physical therapy
- [00:47:46.150]and now I have a stationary bike
- [00:47:47.560]that I use a couple times a week,
- [00:47:51.960]but I am trying to get back up
- [00:47:53.561]to the 11 and a half to 12 miles a day.
- [00:47:58.650]Another benefit to running is being out in the neighborhood.
- [00:48:03.500]I'm out in my neighborhood every day,
- [00:48:04.870]either walking or running
- [00:48:06.480]and I know most neighbors around my block.
- [00:48:09.130]There have been many young couples in their twenties
- [00:48:11.330]who have moved into this neighborhood in the past year
- [00:48:15.540]and they knew I have autism and are very accepting of me.
- [00:48:20.980]Also, years ago, there were four young girls
- [00:48:24.070]who would cheer me on my ran by their houses,
- [00:48:26.339]which were up the street from my house.
- [00:48:31.660]They were very nice girls
- [00:48:36.170]and their parents were really nice
- [00:48:39.020]and I felt very comfortable telling them I had autism
- [00:48:41.960]and they were very accepting of me.
- [00:48:47.600]It was fun watching those girls grow up
- [00:48:49.370]through their adolescence and now they're in their twenties
- [00:48:51.710]and I still enjoy talking to them whenever I see them.
- [00:49:00.660]What's helped me learn to be flexible
- [00:49:03.210]is basically front-loading.
- [00:49:07.140]I can accept changes in my schedule
- [00:49:09.300]if I'm told ahead of time.
- [00:49:13.330]What's helped with preparing for novel situations
- [00:49:16.300]is basically front-loading
- [00:49:25.650]and preparing for them ahead of time.
- [00:49:28.070]I can eat a variety of foods because Mom's a very good cook
- [00:49:31.310]that only knows how to make stuff
- [00:49:33.200]that tastes good, but is healthy
- [00:49:34.950]and she's got me in the kitchen, learning to cook with her.
- [00:49:40.310]I love eating healthy and I love exercise,
- [00:49:43.240]but chocolate is still my downfall.
- [00:49:44.470]With enough structure in my life,
- [00:49:46.622]I can be comfortable with change.
- [00:49:48.380]Here is a list of role models
- [00:49:49.910]that made a lasting impression on my life.
- [00:49:52.420]First is my paternal grandfather.
- [00:49:56.030]He fought in World War II.
- [00:49:58.230]In fact, when he was fighting in World War II,
- [00:50:03.000]he was a flight engineer on a plane.
- [00:50:07.770]A flock of birds flew through the windshield
- [00:50:10.540]of the airplane, knocking out the captain and the copilot
- [00:50:13.590]and he landed the plane, got four bronze stars.
- [00:50:16.230]He would've gotten the Purple Heart,
- [00:50:17.300]except the war was already over.
- [00:50:20.270]After the war, he worked blue collar jobs
- [00:50:24.130]until he took a test for a job for the federal government.
- [00:50:30.070]He scored so high on those tests,
- [00:50:31.980]he was given a second battery of tests
- [00:50:34.200]and he did so well on that second battery of tests
- [00:50:36.800]that he was invited to join Mensa.
- [00:50:39.890]He declined joining Mensa
- [00:50:42.580]because it was beyond his upbringing, so,
- [00:50:51.050]but he got his schooling paid for
- [00:50:54.790]and he got a job for Defense Contracts
- [00:50:58.880]as a computer systems analyst,
- [00:51:00.440]a later computer systems analyst supervisor.
- [00:51:04.080]He was very accommodating of me and very easygoing.
- [00:51:11.100]He had a nine-inch oscillating guest fan
- [00:51:14.200]with push buttons and royal blue blades
- [00:51:16.820]that I just loved to play with
- [00:51:18.160]whenever I went over to his house.
- [00:51:22.140]That fan broke when I was eight years old.
- [00:51:24.470]Otherwise, I would have gotten it from him.
- [00:51:27.400]I am looking for a fan
- [00:51:28.850]identical to the fan that my grandfather had,
- [00:51:31.150]but have not been able to find one.
- [00:51:33.560]I have, however, been able to find one similar
- [00:51:35.970]to the one he had.
- [00:51:38.080]He also had a 12-inch oscillating push button guest fan
- [00:51:40.980]with aqua gray blades that I loved to play with
- [00:51:44.570]and shortly before he passed away, he gave that fan to me
- [00:51:50.410]and then he also got me an all-blue oscillating fan.
- [00:51:54.260]The whole fan is blue and that was the last thing he gave me
- [00:51:57.440]before he passed away.
- [00:51:59.350]So I have those oscillating fans to remember him by.
- [00:52:05.210]He lived to 82 years old
- [00:52:07.430]and remained very healthy right up till the very end.
- [00:52:11.660]Next are my maternal great grandparents.
- [00:52:16.560]My great grandpa, like me, was a regular runner.
- [00:52:22.560]He ran until he was in his late 70s,
- [00:52:24.740]when he started having hip replacements.
- [00:52:27.290]Then he began using a stationary bike.
- [00:52:30.750]When he was in his 80s, he rode on that stationary bike
- [00:52:33.610]for eight hours without stopping,
- [00:52:35.140]just to see if he could do it
- [00:52:36.620]and he got off without suffering any ill effects.
- [00:52:39.830]The person who suffered from this was my great grandmother.
- [00:52:43.880]It freaked her out that he did that.
- [00:52:50.700]He lived to 86 years of age
- [00:52:54.270]and I was five years old when he passed away.
- [00:52:57.840]I remember him being very calm and quiet,
- [00:52:59.910]not really having much to say.
- [00:53:02.790]So, in many ways, I really didn't feel like
- [00:53:05.200]I got to know him that well
- [00:53:07.120]because I was so young when he passed away.
- [00:53:12.420]My great grandma, his wife, overcame adversity
- [00:53:16.370]that happened to her in her childhood
- [00:53:17.590]and made sure that what happened to her
- [00:53:19.240]did not happen to my grandma or my grandma's two brothers.
- [00:53:26.896]I really enjoyed being around her
- [00:53:30.280]and she was more talkative,
- [00:53:31.530]so I really felt like I got to know her better.
- [00:53:36.010]She lived to 91 years of age and she got around fine.
- [00:53:40.760]She had a sharp mind, lived independently,
- [00:53:44.370]and remained very healthy right up till the very end.
- [00:53:48.400]I was almost 10 years old when she passed away
- [00:53:51.800]and I got their oscillating fan they had
- [00:53:55.130]after my great grandma passed away and now I have that fan
- [00:53:58.170]to remember my great grandparents by.
- [00:54:01.500]Going up to visit my great grandparents
- [00:54:03.280]in Edmond, Oklahoma was very calming to me.
- [00:54:05.540]And sometimes when I'm stressed, I go on Google Maps
- [00:54:09.717]and I look at their house that they lived in.
- [00:54:14.940]Next is my elementary school principal, James Baker,
- [00:54:17.800]who did what was in the best interest of the students
- [00:54:19.970]that went to his school,
- [00:54:21.690]even when it wasn't in his own best interest,
- [00:54:24.795]and sometimes got in trouble with his superiors
- [00:54:28.870]for doing what he knew was right.
- [00:54:34.830]Next is my Great Aunt Mary Ann, my dad's aunt.
- [00:54:38.910]She got a PhD in biophysics during the 1950s
- [00:54:43.550]and became a professor until she retired at 82 years of age.
- [00:54:50.000]She, in her later years, she remained very healthy,
- [00:54:54.560]had a great quality of life,
- [00:54:56.720]had a sharp mind, and was very wise.
- [00:55:01.590]She lived to 90.
- [00:55:07.290]Here are some of my future plans.
- [00:55:09.740]Continuing to present to groups that have autism,
- [00:55:12.810]getting married and having a family,
- [00:55:14.779]and running marathons into my 100s,
- [00:55:19.490]maybe with medical advances, into my 120s.
- [00:55:22.720]I plan to become the world's oldest marathoner
- [00:55:26.000]and be very healthy right up till the end of my life.
- [00:55:31.793]I desire out of life what most people desire,
- [00:55:35.670]a sense of belonging, good health,
- [00:55:39.430]spending time with good friends, and a sense of purpose.
- [00:55:46.030]I informed you of my personal perspective for autism.
- [00:55:48.520]Does anybody have any questions?
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